Earlier today I saw a pin on Pinterest that simply said, ‘Own who you are.” For some reason, it really resonated with me in my current season of life. I think it’s something we all struggle with, this idea of being confident in our own skin, and being proud owners of the person we are. I’d argue it’s a two-fold concept; First you have to know who you are, and then you have to own it.
At the age of 30 I know myself more deeply than I ever have. I know a lot of my strengths, I know my weaknesses, and I know my own values and preferences inside and out. But as people we are ever changing and growing, so you have to make a point of constantly re-evaluating yourself. I’m in a strange stage right now, juggling an ever changing, ever challenging work life, planning the biggest event of my life so far, and we are in the process of moving.
Work is probably the area in which I am learning the most about myself. My job is challenging my ability to adapt to new challenges and demands, testing my ability to handle stress and the unknown, and revealing both my good and bad habits. The growth potential is awesome, and overwhelming. But I’m trying to be mindful of myself and approach each day with a fresh perspective and renewed grace and optimism. Some days are better than others, but I am trying to make the most of every learning opportunity.
Wedding planning is challenging me in a whole different way. I’m being forced to accept my own weaknesses, work past them, and be decisive but flexible. I’m embracing the fact that I don’t have to do anything I don’t want to, but also remembering that just because I don’t want to, doesn’t mean certain things shouldn’t happen. At this point, I’d really like to throw my hands up and declare “I’m done!” Whatever is, is, and whatever isn’t… well, I’ll live without it. I can’t do this, of course, but it’s requiring a diligence on my part to stay focused on the end goal and accomplish what needs to be accomplished. It’s the most stressful of all things right now, and is causing me some anxiety. Again, this is requiring a mindfulness on my part and purposeful self-care to balance myself.
We are also anxiously awaiting the closing date on the sale of our current home. We got more than we ever anticipated for the house, despite it needing a new roof and a new A/C unit. We are even more excited about closing on our new home, which will hopefully happen the same day. It will be a stressful week leading up to it, and a crazy weekend I’m sure. But I am reveling in the opportunity it is creating. Pat and I are looking at this new house as a blank canvas; An opportunity to start fresh and redesign our living space. We’ve gotten rid of almost all of our furniture, which was all second or third hand and completely mismatched. We are only moving our bed (for one of the guest bedrooms) and our mismatched washer and dryer. We are getting a new couch, chairs, bar stools, bed and bedding, and even new dishes. Instead of our home being a combination of 2 single people’s belongings, it will finally be a cohesive collection of things we purchase together. As I’ve mentioned in previous posts, I’ve embraced a minimalist vision and am excited for a whole new vibe in my sacred spaces. I’m very much a homebody and believe that your space should be a reflection of your inner self. I’m going to be very judicious about the things I allow to enter my home. No more clutter, no more keeping unused things for the sake of sentiment; Everything with a purpose and a value. It’s going to be refreshing and I’m so excited.
It’s still crazy to think about all of things that have already happened this year, and all of the things yet to come. This is the busiest, most stressful year of my life. And yet I have a deep rooted peace about it; A confidence that is grounding me despite all of the stress. And I believe it is because I do know myself so well now, and more than that, I am owning who I am. Because I know and own who I am, I have confidence in my ability to handle all of the challenges, balance the stress, and otherwise care for myself while also accomplishing all that is needed.
One thing I recommend, if you are trying to get a grasp on yourself and own it, is to embrace and accept every emotion that you feel. Sit with them. All of them. Give them their time and try to understand where they come from. A social media influencer I follow recently posted something I found compelling. She posted about how we as humans only seem to acknowledge, seek, and celebrate happiness, which is very singular and limiting of us. She argued that all emotions, both positive and negative, should be given value and should be shared. Yes, happiness is what we all strive for, and there is something to be said about sharing positivity. But every emotion is beautiful in its own way, and every emotion has value. Sadness is necessary. Anger is valid. Grief is profound. Disappointment is real. Gratitude is beautiful. You cannot live a fulfilled, vibrant life without the entire spectrum of emotion. So don’t avoid them. Don’t do them the disservice of hiding them, or suppressing them. Feel them. Value them. Give them the time they need, process them thoroughly, and understand all of them in context to yourself and your life. They can each teach you so much. Yes, it is uncomfortable. But it’s also really healthy. And in case no one has told you this yet, it’s okay to not be okay.
No one is perfect. The world would be unfathomably boring if we were. Part of owning who you are is owning all of it, the good and bad. You are valuable as you are, you are beautiful inside and out, and you have a purpose in this world. Invest time and energy in yourself, and learn to own all of who you are.
Currently diffusing: Jade Bloom Balsam Fir. I grabbed it randomly tonight before my shower, not even thinking about properties. Turns out it is great for stress-related issues, easing tension, and an anti-depressant. I had a migraine earlier so it’s kind of perfect.
Hello! I’m Whitney and this is my home for all things food and life.